beep bop boop

Beep Bop Boop

FADE IN: girl on the phone, fidgeting with her hair.

Everyone is outta whack right now.

She sighs.

Like, weird phone calls coming in, wrong emails going out. It’s a THANG. You heard about the eclipsed full moon chaos, yeah?

Puzzled look.

It’s just chaos right now – kids acting outta whack, drama all up and down, mind racing – it’s very eclipsy. You know?

She sighs.

I got a week before I go back to classroom life. What the fuck did I do with this time? Time races on, you know. But, like. What the fuck. Beep, bop, boop, I’ll get my shit together.

You know what? I need to lock myself away for like… 5 days straight. Eat canned food and skull old water and just let my creativity burn. Burn, baby, burn! Let’s it rip. Right now I’m just so occupied with this eclipsy feeling. It’s eating at my LIFE. Like, my time, my attention, my diet, my you know. LIFE.

Yeah. One week, baby. Burn it to the gills. Wait. Is that a thing?

She chuckles.

Sounds like something you’d say, right?

The person on the other end chuckles. 

UGH. Ok. Let’s do this, already.  

the path

the path

HE: I just got back!

SHE: Ah! Beirut! How was it?

HE: Insane, four long months, but so much fun.

SHE: I can only imagine. How was New Mexico?!

HE: Soooo good, great to see the fam. It’s been a minute.

SHE: Aw, that’s so good. Tell me all about Beirut!

She looks at him, through him, in awe.
She eases her envious heart by recalling their conversation from a year ago:

“Build references you’re going to need them. How? Do everything you can think of Now. Before you get busy, before the work comes in hard and heavy, before it all changes.
Go to museums, listen to music, fuck everyone, try every kind of food. Do it all, but all the while: keep. going.
Cuz suddenly, it goes from some times to all the time, and then your schedule is booked 2 years in advance.”

Trust.
Faith.
Stay on the path.

kodak kinda thing

90s sprinklers

We’re too far away from the pools.
Mum unfolds the sprinkler in the backyard and lets us play in the water.
My brother loves this shit.
He squeals with delight and makes sure I watch his latest Street Fighter moves.
Hee-yaa!

It’s hot with a cool breeze, the only way Melbourne summer can get, up and down like a bipolar off meds.
I feel the warm mud under my feet, I play with it between my toes.
Squish, squish.

“Liza, I just did it for you!”
I turn to appease my brother, “Ok, do it again.”
How’s mum going to get this wet grass off the floor inside?
My brother karate chops the water in midair, “Did you see that?” he screams.
“Awesome stuff!” I tell him.

Somewhere around there…
I know I will remember this moment.
I know it’s going to be a Kodak kinda thing.
I know it’ll warm my heart later in life.

My dog stops to sniff a sprawling plant taking up way too much space on the sidewalk.
I’m judging the house owner when suddenly –
I hear the sprinkler and turn around like you would an old friend calling you from down the street.
There it is oscillating from left to right, 80s eat your heart out!
And just like that…
I see my brother’s karate moves, I hear his squeals, I feel the mud between my toes.

 

turmeric

Turmeric Tea

He stays in his crate.
Hot water boils.
Sleep is in air.
It’s quiet, except for cars whizzing like the drone of a white noise machine.

I reuse old tea bags.
Kill me.
Tea warms my chin as I type.
I breathe in the earthy smell of turmeric and ginger.

I am thinking stillness.
I am watching the heart carefully open its windows.
I must remain still, allow Grace to unfold.
Or do I disturb it? Say, “This is me! Look at me!”

Well, how much of that noise is actually me?
What am I feeling?
Ok, I am nervous. Anxious.
Heart palpitating with nerves.
Hey, nerves aren’t bad, they can be the positive side of the coin.

It’s so nice to sit here.
The day has yet to begin…
The possibilities are endless.
Turmeric, ginger, stillness, sleepy dogs, a house asleep.

helpless romantic

As we sit in the editing room with our next short film, we look back at our last one:

A hopelessly romantic introvert is coerced by her friends into trying a dating app. What ensues are the mishaps of searching for true love on the interweb. Can a hopeless romantic thrive in the age of online dating?

Sweat, tears, joy and absolute exhilaration.
iHeart, we heart you still.
#MadeinNewYork #STFteam #DreamsComeTrue #RomCom #Romantic

shapeshifter

Hourglass Shapeshifter

I’ve been waiting for what feels like, days.
How time is eternal, and what a shape-shifter.
Did I hurt you?
Was it bad timing?
Do you hate me?
Has all of this time become for naught?

I wait.
You on my mind. All day.
My heart is in anticipation.
Making up a multitude of endings.
She will say this.
No, she will yell.
No, she will ignore me forever.

You have carved your name on these last 5 years.
Five years…
The longest I’ve ever had.
I hope it hurts.
I hope I’ve made a dent.
I hope you tear up like I did.

An hour glass.
Delicate. Smash. Cut.
Hold me.
I am afraid.
I am excited.
I am waiting for this chapter to end.
Please be Grace. Please be Glorious.

church

What is your church?

It’s weird when I have Time.
Real Time.
Honest-to-goodness space.
It’s like the day takes longer to work out.
“Work out,” God. It’s like I’m solving a math quiz.
I can’t switch off the active brain, the workhorse brain.
How about this: the day takes longer to evolve and take shape.
Suddenly space gives me Freedom.
Like, wha?
Freedom to choose (imagine that),
To choose what I want to do with myself, this moment, my purpose.
Yeah, those kinda thoughts.

Suddenly, sitting down with my dog is Acceptable.
Letting myself daze and doze off, is Inviting.
Kicking up my feet and chilling is the Norm.

What do you worship?
What do you spend most of your time/energy/resources on?
What God do you bow to?
Is it the God of work, television, working out, hanging out with friends, doing nothing?
Is it the God of negative thoughts, self-deprecating humor, desperation, competition?
What’s your church?

On days like this, it makes me think real thoughts. Important evolutionary ones.
I could get used to this…